This whole Prom thing is ridiculous. It's pretentious! It's melodramatic! It's one thing if I'm dating some chick and I want to buy her dinner and flowers and the whole nine yards, but I'm not! I'm going with a friend, which is actually what a TON of people do. And I don't mind paying for all that, not really, but I think it's weird. It kind of overlooks the whole point of those gestures being romantic and thoughtful.

Now we just do them because it's expected. Expectations! Traditions! I hate them a bit. When a society commercializes kindness then it's no longer kindness to do things like buy a girl chocolates or something like that. It's expected. Imagine if a dude buys gifts or makes a loving gesture several times a year, just because, and doesn't think Valentine's Day is anything special because, to him, every day is special. Even if he does all sorts of nice things, if he doesn't do anything on Valentine's Day then the girl is going to feel a bit miffed. And I don't blame her. It's not her fault for being miffed, it just sucks that there's a day that everyone expects a surprise.

(All of this is gender-reversible, by the way. It's just easier to type from one point of view.

Doesn't that just SOUND dumb? Expecting a surprise? And that's the best scenario. At least if they're "expecting a surprise" then the whole thing has the tiniest semblance of magic. Otherwise it's just, "OK, where is my card?"

The whole point of doing nice things for someone you care about is to NOT have a reason to do them. That is what I meant by "surprise," by the way...not that she doesn't expect it, but that there was no particular reason to do it in the first place. (It just so happens that this often is a surprise!) This should apply to basically every gift-giving holiday and partially to Prom-esque traditions. Christmas is great, but I think it's awful that people actually thing that they "owe" a present to someone. Valentine's Day? Sort of obnoxious and awkward for way too many people. Anniversaries are way more legit, but slowly also becoming Mundane over Magical with the long-past advent of the Anniversary Calendar

The mother of the girl I'm taking made it very clear that she expects me to be chivalrous. BUT IT'S NOT! Even if I was planning on being chivalrous, now everything I do is less special because it's just the norm. And worse, it will be less special when it really IS a romantic gesture (as opposed to being chivalrous, which is sort of in the middle).

UGH.

This falls under the same category of The Kid Who Apologized Because You Told Him To, Saying I Love You Because She Said It/Because That's What Couples Do, and, according to Oscar Wilde, most aspects of Victorian Society.

Here's a more/less interesting topic!

I went to Georgia Tech for a legit tour yesterday. 4.5 hours driving in each direction! Crazy drivers going 30 or 40 over the speed limit! LOTS OF WALKING (it was a FANTASTIC tour though). My mom became very tired and very cranky. I just switched tenses! I may have done that a few times already, actually.

Um.

I saw Kick Ass yesterday. Pretty exciting. I just realized that one of the characters who you'd think would at least play a minor role COMPLETELY drops off the script after one appearance...if you knew the character and her relationship to the other characters, it would bother you too! But yeah I liked it a lot.

It does suck that we're all expected to act in certain ways, but I tend to look at it as end vs. means. There's some small comfort in knowing that even if you're doing what you're obligated to do, you can at least be sincere about it.

Alternatively, you could throw off the shackles of society and just give the finger to behavioral expectations and etiquette. XP
» randomjunk on 2010-04-18 01:26:38

Well, the only way I can think of is to make no effort to do anything anyone expects of you, but if you did that you would probably lose a lot of friends/respect.
» randomjunk on 2010-04-18 02:18:29

agreed
I think you should just tell that girl's mom exactly what you told us.

It is so hard to read your blog. My eyes are going crazy @_@ I had to highlight everything so I could read it.
» Silver-dot- on 2010-04-18 03:59:05

Yes, prom is stupid. The worse part for me was organizing groups...because some people didn't want to be with these other people and I didn't care because I'm not a hater and blah blah blah...big stupid mess. And thank goodness we went somewhere less-ritzy but also less-cheap, cuz prom ended up sucking.

Yup, there's muffy's sordid tale, hopefully yours will turn out much more enriching and chivalrous mehehe

Hahah I agree with dotty! I have to highlight your blog every time I read it. Also, I don't think I've ever seen that many exclamation points in a single entry before. You were clearly very agitated
» The-Muffin-Man on 2010-04-19 05:10:07

Waaait waiiit no no I like this exclamation point thing! I just read a comment from you to randy's blog...and...it was just so much more exciting! Yes!
» The-Muffin-Man on 2010-04-19 05:14:00

i saw kick ass also. it was pretty awesome. not what i expected out of it at all. but a really good story.
» thaitanic on 2010-04-19 08:46:02

My mom always taught me not to say I'm sorry unless I meant it and I have pissed off many people for not apologizing for something I wasn't sorry for. Wtf is that? To be less mad bc I lied?

I went to prom with a friend and I was shocked when he wouldn't accept my money for my ticket ((I had to have a date ticket bc it was a school I no longer attended) and even more shocked when he paid for dinner and was a sweet gentlemen. Maybe your friend will be the same.
» lyndeep on 2010-04-20 06:29:20

Ah, the Prom. So complicated. I guess you could just pretend like your prom is a big dress rehearsal for real romance.

I also highlight your blog when I read it.
» Zanzibar on 2010-04-20 11:01:58

Hooray for highlighting!!!
I didn't have a prom. My graduating class included a grand total of seven people. Going to a really small high school has one advantage, I can easily say I graduated in the top 10 of my class.

Expectations too often make liars of us all. I love giving gifts and surprising people, but only when I feel it. The expectation that a gift must be given at Christmas, birthdays, V-D (Valentine's Day), anniversaries, and the like ruins the spontaneity and sincerity of it all.
» fakebil on 2010-04-21 01:53:01

Hey jerkface, thanks for telling us you're going to Georgia Tech.
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